What's it really like now?

It's been a long, long time since I've stepped outside
In the morning sun now

Save some face

You know you've only got one.
Change your ways while you're young.

OH MY GOD HARRY POTTER TOMORROW AT MIDNIGHT.
I can play three pages of Moonlight Sonata :) Jeff got me addicted to Tetris. He turned 18 on Saturday and got his permit Monday :) The Craving on Friday. Reid's gonna be awesome in it, like always. I'm gonna be so tired lol

Find a cure

Find a cure for my life. OH MY GOD!
Oh, you think I'm in control! Oh my god!
Oh, you think it's all for fun

Haven't posted a blog in a million years. Uhhh got my permit, Halloween was awesome, basically failed math, RB3 is fun, and I want to watch Saw and The Human Centipede. Idk what else.

Is this fun for you? Oh. My. GOD!
Oh my god!

CLICK THIS.

People told me

Slow my roll, I'm screaming out fuck that!
Imma do just what I want lookin’ ahead no turnin’ back

Homecoming was awesome. Best dance so far, fer sure. Finals this week :( Really scared about my math grade... this isn't going to be good. Halloween thing for Key Club Friday. Kathryn and I are going to be 50's girls. It'll be cute haha. I wanna see Paranormal Activity 2 with people afterward. Got my permit yesterday! Just need to take some behind the wheel classes. This month is hectic.

I'm on the pursuit of happiness and I know everything that shines ain't always gonna be gold

Well, you know gray is my favorite color

I felt so symbolic yesterday

I've been doing math literally all day. I better raise this freakin grade. Yesterday I went homecoming dress shopping. It always takes me forever haha we started at 2ish and left around 6. I got a strapless one that's kinda silvery gray. I tried on this one at "cutegirl.com" (Wtf kind of name is cutegirl.com for a store in the mall?) and it was so gross. It had like open sides and it was all pink zebra striped. Definitely the best one I saw yesterday. I took a picture, but I really don't want that online lol. I looked like a hooker. Christine and I tried on disco ball dresses, they were actually really cute. Kathryn, Liz, and I made class shirts last night, too. They look really good. We were watching this old movie, The Fly. It was so gross! Me and Liz couldn't stop laughing. "Aw yeah, touch me with your fly hands." hahaha
Anyway, tomorrow is decades day. I'm going for like, rocker-80s... but kind of failing because I don't want to look retarded. So it's mostly 80s makeup, big hair, and a big band shirt, tied at the side. Christine, Kathryn, and I are going to be twins on Tuesday. Then I'm probably not going to do western day. Can't wait to wear the shirts on Friday. Then homecoming on Saturday.. :/ This blog is really long.

If I knew Picasso I would buy myself a gray guitar and play
Mr. Jones, and me.....

Don't waste your time on me

You're already the voice inside my head!

I know I posted already today, but here's some pics :P

<3

Oh, it should've been

Could've been worse than you would ever know
Well, you you told me about nowhere
Well, it sounds like someplace I'd like to go

Christine made me that awesome banner :D

Right now my mom's making me waffles with bacon in them. I'm excited, I think it will be awesome haha and it smells reallllly good. I don't really have anything to say... Yesterday I went to Sean's. Met a couple new people, played Halo, ate pizza, hung out with Jeff :) Speaking of pizza, Christine and I have a song now lofl. I think I'm gonna put new songs on the side there. I'm pretty sure I'm the only one that listens to them and I'm bored with them. I changed my belly button thing yesterday. When I was trying to put the new one in I think I almost passed out haha I had to like, lay down on the bathroom floor. I don't even know why, it wasn't that gross. I got a hoop for my nose, too. I'm not sure if I like it or not. It's different :P and noticeable. I think I want to be goth for halloween. It's October!! :D

The dashboard melted but we still have the radio

Whatever lies beyond

This mooooorning is a little later on
Regardless of warning, the future doesn't scare me at aaaaalllll
Nothing's like before

I freakin love Kingdom Hearts. Jeff came over yesterday (6 months!) and we played KH2 like, all day. He's awesome and made lines from the game into a song. I woke up with it stuck in my head but now I can't remember how it went lol. The first game is soo much better. "I've been having these weird thoughts lately... is any of this for real... or not?"



Alex dragged my KH necklace somewhere and now I can't find it :/ WTB another one.

Drag it out

Drag it out, drag it out, drag it.

I'm procrastinating. I should be writing an essay that's due tomorrow, but it's super hard and super boring. I'm on like, sentence five out of two pages. Whatever, I'll get it done, it's only 11 PM, no biggie.
Hung out with Jeff today and Rock Band-ing it up tomorrow after school, I think. Thank god it's almost Friday :P I've never appreciated weekends as much as I do this school year, and it's only been three weeks. Maybe it will start to suck less... ("That was a joke. ha ha. fat chance.")

Happy Birthday, Alex. Two years old :)

You live too far away

Your voice rings like a bell anyway
Don't give up your independence unless it feels so right
Nothing good comes easily, sometimes you have to fight.

Haven't blogged in a while. Don't have much to say. School is difficult. Weekends are too short.

This is awesome

and this is really funny.

Whoa, amber is the color of your energy
Whoa, shades of gold displayed naturally

When I come home

Well I know I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be the man who's comin' home to you
And when I grow old,
Well I know I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be the man who's growin' old with you

5 more days of summer :( I swear, I'm spiraling into depression ;P I haven't even gone back to school shopping yet, I'm definitely not ready for this. Today was the first Tuesday all summer that Jeff and I didn't hang out. It's also the first day I've just sat around at home in a while, which is super boring. I took advantage of my free time and started teaching myself how to play (this) on piano. I can play up until :39, it doesn't sound right yet, though. My mom got back from AZ tonight. She brought me heeellllaa Mexican candy :D I missed Lucas so much. One of the things she brought me is called like "Liquid Chili Goo" Or something like that, and ohhh my god, it is disgusting. It's all watery and tastes like spicy garbage lol. Everything else is a winner though. These have always been my favorite.

Well I would walk 500 miles, and I would walk 500 more!

5 months tomorrow :)

I'm treading for my life

Believe me. How can one keep up this breathing?
Not knowing how to think, I scream aloud, begin to sink

Saw my favorite sister today :) She's only here until super early tomorrow morning, though, so I already said bye and stuff. Cyndi and Josh came over and Jeff got to meet her :) so it was pretty cool. My mom promised to bring me Mexican candy when she comes back! Mmmm lucas and chili-covered things. Probably gonna see if Christine wants to hang out tomorrow. We're on year 4 of Lego HP haha. After orientation we went to her house and played. Speaking of orientation, my schedule is going to kill me this year :P Why did I take so many AP classes? Drawing and Painting will be fun, though... and Film and Lit might be cool.

Into the ocean, end it all, into the ocean, end it all, into the ocean, end it all, into the ocean, end it all, into the ocean, end it all

Lights go out

And I can't be saved. Tides that I tried to swim against.
Force me down upon my knees, oh I beg, I beg and plead
Singin', come out of things unsaid, shoot an apple off my head
With a trouble that can't be named, Tigers waiting to be tamed, singin'...

Less than 2 weeks of summer left :( Orientation on Thursday, too. I want either Jeff or Willie in a ketchup suit to photobomb my ID pic hahah. Hung out with them today. We played Super Smash Bros then went to my house. I don't even really remember what we did then, I wasn't paying much attention to today :P Made Willie a friendship bracelet, he loved it lol. Sad about not seeing Jeff until maybe Saturday now, but I'm super excited to see Sarah on Friday :D It's been forever, I miss her.

Sunday and Monday were awesome. I miss Christine already :P We went to Amtgard, read an oracle for teenage witches, played a bunch of Lego Harry Potter on the 360, which is amazing, then ate stuff with bbq sauce on it and played Sims and stickam-ed and I took hella pics of myself yawning lmao. We watched this movie, Simon Says, at like, 6 in the morning. It was super creepy, Grispin Clover is a weirdo hahaha.

Oh, nothing else compares. Nothing else compares
Home, where I wanted to go...

I could only blame myself

you could only blame me.


WHY HAVE I NOT HEARD THIS BEFORE NOW? My god it is beautiful. I've been looking up acoustic versions of all the Coldplay songs I like. (Which is all of them.) I'm making Bethany listen to a crapload of Coldplay :) she totally loves it. "I would shoot his voice into my veins and OD on it."

Tom threw his friend T.J. a surprise party today. It was pretty fun :) Tom, Christine, and I long boarded outside and we played some Halo. For a while we were just all telling as many super offensive jokes as we could think of. I wish Jeff had gone, he woulda had fun. Christine's hair looks awesome. It's like the sun lolol :D I cut my bangs into straight bangs last night. Sometimes I like them, others I don't :P

I loooove this.

Are you lost or incomplete? Do you feel like a puzzle, you can't find your missing piece?

I don't mind if you don't mind

Cuz I don't shine if you don't shine
Before you go, could you read my mind?

Waking up at noon is a bad idea, because being very awake when you want to sleep at midnight is lame. I re-dyed the red part of my hair :) I love it haha. By the way, dying hair without gloves = an hour. Dying hair with gloves = 5 minutes. Decided to take a break from Shark Week and watch Peter Pan (not the lame Disney one.) a couple hours ago... but I didn't fall asleep, so I'm watching it again now. I swear it has the best music. I need to get Hook on dvd, because that movie is freakin amazing. Jeff asked me who I'd be with if I wasn't with him and I could pick anyone in the world, and I picked Robin Williams lol. I don't even care that he's old and... not attractive :P, he's hilarious. Speaking of hilarious, click. Been talking to Bethany a lot lately :) it makes me happy. She's down for living with all of us at the beach after high school.

It's August already. fffffffffml.
20 something days until school :(

I want something else

to get me through this semi-charmed kind of life,
Baby, baby!
I want something else, I'm not listening when you say
Goodbyyyyyeeeeee

Remember when I said something about this summer being way too slow and needing to be over? I lied. There's only like, 4 more weeks of summer! F MY LIFE hahaha. This may be my favorite summer so far, except for maybe that one when I went on a cruise to Mexico. That was like, a week before school started, though, so the rest of my summer was probably lame. Hung out at Sean's with Jeff and everybody today and yesterday, which was fun :) We watched Back the the Future: Part 3 and got pizza today. I started cleaning my room this week! It almost doesn't look like a tornado came though here. I only spend like, maybe 45 min a day plus the time I'm sleeping in here, but it always gets super messy barely a week after I clean it. I say like too much. Anyway, look what I found-

Too cool, right? :)

Scar tissue that I wish you saw

Sarcastic mister know it all. Close your eyes
and I'll kiss you cause with the birds I'll share
With the bird I'll share
This lonely view

Jeezus I am bored. Today and yesterday are absolutely pointless. Supposed to go to Santa Cruz yesterday, but my mom said no of course and they ended up not going anyway.. Supposed to leave for LA today, but my aunt called me last night and said my cousin was having trouble with their lease (we were gonna help them move) so we're gonna wait a couple weeks. Sooo now I'm bored. Probably gonna hang out with Jeff tomorrow, cuz I haven't seen him in a thousand years. I think Christine and I should go to amtgard Sunday (If you're reading this, I miss you!) cuz we haven't hung out in helllla days. I guess she's learning the Fresh Prince song on the uke lol awesome.

Reread Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire recently. (Finished it while camping- surprise, surprise, lots of free time there.) I forgot how much the movies suck compared to the books haha. Like, the part at the graveyard and when he gets back is so much more intense in the book, it's crazy :P I'm think I'm boutsta read the first one next, but I still haven't read the first few chapters of three haha so I might read Prisoner of Azkaban (sp?).

I want to dye my hair. It's so boring :P I forgot there was a reason I didn't want my natural hair color. I like this but I think it would look weird on meee... so I'm probably just gonna do dark brown again.

4 months with Jeff on sunday :)

In the middle of the niiight

I go walkin' in my sleep. Through the jungle of doubt, to a river so deep! I know I'm searching for something, something so undefined That it can only be seen by the eyes of the blind In the middle of the night!

Just got back from camping today :) four days is a really long time to be camping. The first place in Bodega Bay was freezing and wet haha but the beach was pretty. There were a bunch of jellyfish washed up on the sand. I liked the second place in Butano better. Yesterday we drove to Santa Cruz and went to the boardwalk. I had a deep fried twinkie lol.. I told Kathryn he can punch me in the face for that next time she sees me. I wanna live in Santa Cruz after high school.

cool, right?

Went to Schotter's with Jeff today after I got home. They showed me this. haha "music is all magic. You can't even hold it!" And also this.

Been around the world

and found that only stupid people are breeding
The cretins cloning and feeding..
and I don't even own a tv.

Yesterday and the day before were all kinds of awesome. Jeff and Willie invented Impossigolf haha. Stats:
Jeff- Best player, co-founder
Willie- First to win a game, co-founder
Marisa- First to score
My back still hurts from playing on Monday :P I'm a billion years old. Look what I found yesterday :D

It's so amazing. I want to be a part of it. Click and click and click and click :) Anyway, camping with Kathryn tomorrow through saturdayyy. Gonna be fun. I hope they bring the hammock so we can sit in it and sing together hahaha. Good times :) Probably going to amtgard Sunday cuz I have no idea what my family is doing for 4th of July. I just wanna see Jeff and jam on the ukulele with Christine lol

Put me in the hospital for nerves
and then they had to commit me
you told them all I was crazy!
they cut off my legs now, I'm an amputee,
god damn you!
:)

I had visions, I was in them

I was looking into the mirror
to see a little bit clearer, the rottenness and evil in me

So I haven't blogged in a while..
Summer is ridiculously boring, I seriously think time started going slower the second school got out. I can't believe it's only been a week. Also, I miss Jeff like crazy :( buuut I'm done complaining. Christine and I saw Clash of the Titans on Friday. We got asked on a date by some guy and then harassed (lol) by this woman at a kiosk thing. "miss... miss? miss! MISS!!" She was crazy. Called my dad yesterday, but chickened out on asking if I could bring a friend or two with me when I visit him this summer. He was like, "so is that your boyfriend in your picture on facebook? Tell him to keep his hands to himself." lmao

Going camping next weekend :) Hopefullyyyy Jeff is going, too. My mom made reservations at Clear Lake and I haven't been there yet, so I'm looking forward to it.

Fingertips have memories,
mine can't forget the curves of your body

This is my stop

Got to get off! I may go pop!
excuse me... excuse me?
I've got to be direct, if I may please correct
You're standing on my neck.

At Amtgard on Sunday, Christine and I basically sat in the grass and played ukulele for a billion hours. We were hella improvising, too :P which apparently is only a bitch on piano, because it was easy on the uke. We made up an awesome song, but it only has 4 lines haha.

Jeff, Christine, Willeh, and I were playing Rock Band today. JMC is amazing ;) they were hella gold starring things before I started playing, sooo I think I should play more Rock Band and not be so terrible lol. A Jagged Gorgeous Winter was stuck in all of our heads after we stopped playing. I just had the "Drag it out, drag it out" part stuck in mine, though, which is only like, 2 seconds long, so it sucked haha

Jeff's graduation in tomorrow :(

Beard-o,
He's over there.

But she's covered in flaws

She's not the supreme girl that I thought she was
not the supreme girl that I thought she was

I haven't posted anything in a while :P
Only 5 more days of school!! and only one more full day, then we get out at 12 every other day, I think. I'm not all "FFFUUUUUU-" about it now that Jeff's already had his last day. I was not looking forward to that. I'm pretty sure I'm going to his graduation on Tuesday, which is going to be ridiculously sad. I got a cute dress for it, though. Yesterday we played Rock Band until like, 10:30 lol. I failed White Wedding a bajillion times singing on expert. Our Rock Band band- Jeff, Christine, Willeh, and I- is gonna be awesome ;)

Going to Amtgard with Christine tomorrow! She's boutsta bring her Ukeleleh so we can play music instead of sitting there doing nothing for a million hours. Maybe we'll explore again, too, and I can give her a tour of the area lol. "Up ahead to the right we have apartments... and more apartments."

I like The Sterns a lot right now. (click)

Livin' in the sunlight!

Lovin' in the moonlight!
Having a wonderful TIIIIME!

That song is going to be stuck in my head for forever. Christinee didn't know who Tiny Tim was before today :D We were getting so excited over the videos we would find lol. I think we went from "Big Booty Bitches" to Chris Crocker to Crazytrumpeter girl to Tiny Tim to Bruno to Saveedish accents to scene Miley Cyrus covers. (Watch this!) In third period, Nick was singing that while Marcelo danced. It was so freakin' hilarious. Everything about today has been funny, though :) Christine and I are never gonna be able to eat seriously again haha

I'm watching HP1 right noww. "Pity... Clearly, fame isn't everything... is it... Mr. Potter?"

Little bitches, get out! We don't want no skinny bitches!

Tell me, did the wind sweep you off your feet

Did you finally get a chance to dance along the light of day
and head back toward the Milky Way
and tell me, did Venus blow your mind?
Was it everything you wanted to find and
did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there?

I went to Amtgard with Jeff today. Kept getting hit in the face and I felt really bad making people who actually wanted to fight deal with me.., so I just sat out and watched most of it :P There was this homeless guy there that was being so awkward. When my mom picked me up, I looked over at where he had been sitting, and he was taking his pants off D: I'm so glad I left before I had to see that haha... gross.

(cliiiick!)

And I could write a song

a hundred miles long
Well that's where I belong, and you belong with me
The streets you're walking on, a thousand houses long
Well that's where I belong, and you belong with me
Not swallowed in the sea.
I love Coldplay.

Why did i make a blog? :P the only person that I think reads this is Christine, and I tell her everything that I would write here anyway haha. And the stuff that I actually want to write about is stuff that I wouldn't want people reading, annnnd.. idk. It's probably just so I can post song lyrics that I like- I honestly missed that :P Maybe I'll be boring and write about things tomorrow.

Today is two months with Jeff :)
i love him so much.

Oh, my talking bird

though your feathers are tattered and furled
I'll love you all the days
til the breath leaves your delicate frame

Every song by Death Cab is so sad, but I can't stop listening to them :P I want to jam (lol) with Christine again so we can do I'll Follow You into the Dark. It was awesome, her house is like the band room and, unlike my house, we can be hella loud. Our versions of songs from Phantom of the Opera were amazing lolll

I think one of my teachers said we only have 19 more school days left :/
Time goes by way too fast.

It's all here for you as long as you choose to stay
It's all here for you as long as you don't fly away

I do believe it's true

there are roads left in both or our shoes
and if the silence takes you,
then I hope it takes me, too.

I don't know why, but i really wanted to start a blog again today. I had one forever ago, but my mom found it and wanted me to delete it because of personal info that was on it. Then I made another one, buuuut, idk, it was boring cuz I didnt actually write about things and I just stopped posting stuff. That's probably what will happen with this one, cuz I don't know what to write about anymore :P I wish I had just set that first one to private, because I really want to read what I had written about. Christine's old posts are so funny, cuz everything seems like it was so long ago (click). Hopefully she'll blog again, too ;)

So brown eyes I hold you near,
cuz you're the only song I want to hear
a melody softly floating through my atmosphere

is there a way to have one blog, but some of the posts are private? I can't figure it out. On myspace i wrote a blog that was probably a million words long, then just decided against posting it. It was ridiculous haha.. that night sucked. Weeell, I don't know what to write about right now.
l8rg8r ;)

When soul meets bodyyyyy